“Why did you do all this for me?’ he asked. ‘I don’t deserve it. I’ve never done anything for you.’ ‘You have been my friend,’ replied Charlotte. ‘That in itself is a tremendous thing.” ― E.B. White
I was lucky to be born into a family where there were already two beautiful young women making their way in the world. I was always destined to be their little sister. To embarrass them. To get in their way. To learn the lessons that they didn’t even know they were teaching me. The adult relationship I have with my sister is one of the most primal and important relationships in my life. The level of compassionate understanding, the deep sense of radical acceptance that we have for each other gets stronger and deeper every single year as we navigate our adult lives.
My sisters live hours away from me, and I’ve been lucky enough to be welcomed in to the fold of another kind of sisterhood here in the regional town that I live. I have more than a handful of strong, powerful female friends who probably have no idea the transformative affect they have had over my life in the past three years. The way they have paved the path for me to walk from grief into strength. The way that their love and acceptance healed the deep wounds in me that I never though would close. The way the gathering of spirits washes the fear and the doubt from my heart and gives me the strength to do exactly what I need to do, when I need to do it.
There is something about gathering with other compassionate women, that only a woman could understand. To be together with the love and the laughter (and the sarcasm and wit) of what can only be explained as the female experience. There is no price that could be placed on Sharing the deepest, darkest and often most hidden parts of our inner worlds with eachother so that we never have to experience it alone.
I often always wish I had more time to spend with these wonderful women. A few short hours alone with them a month is hardly enough. They are the strongest, funniest, most compassionate women I know and are a true sign of what I think is present in most grounded, honest women – they have absolutely no idea just how fantastic they are. But each of them is a brilliant, spectacular woman in their own right.
To those women (and you know who you are), the sisters of blood and the sisters of time and place. I love you. I love that you come to my door with flowers in the middle of a winter in my heart. I love that you leave chocolates melting in my mailbox in the middle of summer when you know I’m having a shit week. I love that you always know it’s me when I leave love notes and chocolate chip cookies at your door. I love that I can fall into your arms in a moment of weakness and you always hold me a few moments longer than you need to. I love that you call me out on my bullshit and that you remind me of my truth even when I am desperately blind to it. I love how you encourage me to be a better person and you let me cry big sloppy tears when I’m angry and frustrated and you don’t try to fix me, you just listen and remind me that I am not alone.
I love that you get angry with me when I need you too, and that you know exactly how to pull me back from the edge when I’m feeling completely and utterly lost.
I love how diverse and spectacular and different you all are, strong, glorious, giving women… You are the most spectacular cross section of the female experience all navigating different paths, different fears, different lives but when we are together our experiences aren’t just ours alone, they are are the experiences of every woman, and because of that we are never alone. I love how there is this energy in our community and that my own daughter is constantly surrounded by compassionate, kind and non judgemental women who love and accept her too.
I love every single one of you not only for the beauty and the clarity you bring to my life (and you do that and so much more) but to the beauty and strength and kindness and clarity (and sarcasm) you bring to the world.
I don’t tell you often enough how much I appreciate you. I wouldn’t be the person who I am today without you.
Thank you.
Here is to strong women, may we know them, may we be them, may we raise them – Unknown.
I hope you all have some strong, powerful, compassionate women in your lives too… remember to tell them how much you appreciate them, no one can hear it enough. x
tamara - What a beautiful post on the eve of international womens day. Thankyou for being brave enough to put this out there. I too live far from my blood sisters, and I value and cherish the women who play that role for me nearer to me. I have been reminded by you to let them know that I cherish them. Happy international womens day!
Michelle - What you’ve beautifully described is one of our world’s most precious gifts to women. I pray my circle of sisters continues to thrive and grow and that the joy of true friendship spreads peace to every corner.
Bec T - Such a lovely piece! I’m so happy for you to have found your community sisterhood here locally 😉
Ruth Milne - Love this, love you and love our relationship and how it has evolved over the years. Wouldn’t change a thing except to have you closer. I love you xo