Another week, come and gone. Another week closer to Bo’s first birthday. Another week further away from the “event”… Another week into a new year. I thought I would have more clarity by now. But I don’t. I thought maybe by now I’d have it figured out… I think I may have been delusional. There has been many difficult conversations (or non-conversations) with my other half this week. I’ll write about it some time. When I have a bit more clarity on what it is I feel. When I’m not so numb and so full of emotion all at once.
This week we were lucky to have time with lots of people who truly do love us. Both Bo and I. An Australia day party with new friends. A new haircut. A breath of fresh air. A birthday party for a special little boy surrounded by family. Nights at my sisters. Meetings with friends at some of the worlds most beautiful inner city beaches. New friends and old friends. Ice creams and sandwiches and sand between our toes. Long drives, some with tears, others without. It was all up a good week. Not a perfect week. But a good week none-the-less. Bo is forever surprising and amazing me… *warning: proud mama gush ahead* Her comprehension amazes me. She follows instructions. She kisses and loves with all of her heart… you can just tell. She has a wicked sense of humour, she laughs and sticks her belly out like a big fat jolly man, patting her belly and chuckling like she’s just been told a dirty joke.
She makes me sing. And that makes all the crap… all the hurt… the sleepless nights. The stress, the lack of time, the loss of identity, the vomit in my hair… it makes it all easier. I mean, just look at her… she’s freaking amazing. And I made her. I don’t think I’ve ever been prouder.
Two steps forward, one step back… at least it’s a little bit of progress, right? Thank you all for your love and support and LOVE LOVE LOVE. You ladies rock, seriously.
I hope each and every one of you have a beautiful, fun filled weekend surrounded by the people you love, and the people who love you. Life is too short to surround yourself with negativity… sometimes we all just have to walk away, take a deep breath and remember what it is that makes us smile… then go and do that.
xox Big love to you all.