Winter decided to go out with a bang in our house this week. Bo landed herself with a virus unlike anything she has had before. On Sunday afternoon we were sitting in the emergency room, a baby who was burning up on my lap, a baby who had just thrown up like the exorcist in the backseat of my car on the way home from a quick trip to the shops for supplies. I thought it was bad then… every day she seemed to improve and by the afternoon she would get worse again. I dragged her along to work with me on Monday morning, too sick to go to day-care and there was no one to cover me at work. so I worked for two hours with a toddler on my hip until she had a meltdown and I took her home. there were a lot of tears and seven days of fevers. Finally yesterday afternoon the fevers broke once and for all (fingers crossed) and today I only worked a half day so I could be home with her this afternoon when my mum couldn’t watch her. For the first time in a week she was awake and happy to sit and play on her own for an hour or two while I fielded a few work calls and answered some emails. It was a week from hell, and I’m extraordinarily grateful that it is OVER.
Somewhere amongst the snot and the vomit and the fevers and the various trips to hospitals and doctors and chemists… I found myself in the midst of an existential crisis of my own. I go through these quite regularly. I find myself stuck on a dream that I may have had in the only three minutes I got to sleep one night… or a smell brings up old memories… or I watch friends on TV living their dream, a dream that was once mine. And I find myself questioning everything I do. So I spun around the house (that was subsequently falling apart…) washing dishes in the bath tub (because, in a hell week the kitchen sink is bound to get blocked), hanging twine clothes lines under the (leaking) back patio desperately trying to dry the now-clean debris of an exorcist explosion (because of course it rains non stop on hell week)… all whilst juggling a terribly clingy, horribly sick baby whilst fighting with an internal monologue of “what the hell are you doing with your life…..”
Aaaah… Thank god it’s Friday, as they say. The rain seems to have eased (the figurative, not the literal, not tonight at least) and the sun seems to be peering out once more. Bo’s smiling again, my plumber finally arrived and unblocked my sink, the laundry is dry (not folded and certainly not put away) and we both made it through in one piece. that existential crisis… well… it’s probably going to hang around for a while I think. I deferred my final semester of my masters last night. Bo and I are flying out to Canada in three weeks (THREE WEEKS) and I just couldn’t juggle it all. What’s six months extra worth of study for a joyfully carefree month in one of my favourite cities in the world? Toronto in fall… there are few places I’d rather be.
Another weekend of catching our breath before another full week of work. I’m finding it hard to believe that in three weeks we will be boarding that longest-flight-in-the-world between Sydney and Toronto… juggling a wildcard toddler on my knee for 20 hours… and off on an all new adventure all over again. I can’t wait. My feet have been itching to travel. I’ve been in one place far too long… it’s time to get moving!
Anyone in Sydney want to have lunch on Monday the 23rd? Bo and I will be in town… Anyone in Toronto want to play? We will be in your fine city for four glorious weeks and we’d love some local tour guides to show us around!
Have a glorious weekend friends, I hope the sun comes out for us all!
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