Sleep deprivation. There is a reason it is used as a form of torture. If my body was a gas tank and sleep was that sweet, sweet fuel… I’d be running on empty. I’d be broken down and left to decay on a side street somewhere with no money to tow my sad, sorry arse home again.
There is nothing quite like being a parent whose baby doesn’t sleep. It’s a level of frustration that goes well above and beyond anything i have ever experienced before. Not frustration with the baby so much as frustration that is perhaps taken out on the rest of the world… often unnecessarily. It’s not actually the rest of the worlds fault, it’s no ones fault… but some days, some days I wish there was someone to blame.
Having not had more then 3 hours of sleep in a row since Bo was born almost nine months ago is wearing me down. Like right down…
Hellooooo struggle town. Now, tell me I’m not alone?
I took Bo to baby rhyme time this morning. We’ve only started doing these very western mama and baby things in the past few weeks and I”m so happy to have the opportunity to do them. I meet other mamas and I feel like i”m not alone on this big crazy ride… and being not alone is awesome. Right? Anyway. So we went and we sang some songs about spiders and stars and clapping our hands when we are happy and all that Jazz. Well, I sang, the other mamas sang and Bo crawled around like she was in crazy town trying to tear every beautifully illustrated page out of every single book she could lay her sticky little fingers on. All whilst making the worlds loudest fart noises… much to the dismay of another little girl who was in attendance ‘that baby keeps making whoopsies with her mouth mama‘. Whatevs I think, be a baby (but you know, don’t destroy the books yo… here are some super baby proof ones for you to put your slobbery little mouth on) get your grove on Bo-freak… (but you know, try not to pull that other babies ears off, she may have a totally bizarre-o name but she also likes her ears attached to the sides of her head. Thanks.)
After all the joyous singing and clapping and stamp-your-feeting good times. Us mamas are left to our own devices with cups of tea and babies and piles of toys and books and the forever inappropriate question – How often do you sleep? That I just can’t help but ask every one who has ever had a baby. And HOW did you get that baby to sleep? Everyone’s baby it would seem sleeps like a champion. As one of the mothers looked at me with such pity, when I told my sad-state-of-affairs sleep story… she shook her head… I would just die if I didn’t sleep. She said to me. I hear ya lady. I hear ya. But how?! One mama just shrugged her shoulders and told us she was off to put her little cherub off for her next nap for the day. NEXT NAP. Holy hell. Bo had been up for 5 hours already by this point and was going strong… There are some natural sleepers out there. Which is awesome (and I’m more than a little jealous of their mamas but hey, you know, you get what you get right?)… FOR.THEM. Then there is the routine-ers, the baby sleep trainers, the cry-it-out-ers. Which is fine, if that’s your thing. But it’s not mine. It’s just not. I’ve done my research, I’ve made my choices. So… what do I do? How do I maintain my approach to parenting AND solve our never ending sleep dramas?
Tell me I am not alone people!!! Someone tell me there is an end in site before every single one of the hairs on my head falls on the floor and I collapse on top of them after tripping over the bags that hang from my eye sockets.
How do you sleep?